Made an RE appt

Well, yesterday I made my first RE appt. I searched the top doctors and called one that is all the way up in Englewood and we are going there on Sept 19th. The sad realization that I really do need help to conceive hit me yesterday. It's quite upsetting and it hurts to know that you can't do what God gave us all the privilege to do by ourselves, in the privacy of our own home. I hope that my insurance kicks in before the 19th or else I will have to postpone the appointment because it is out-of-network, so if we're going to pay the $, it might as well be put towards our deductible. It's frightening to know just how much medical bills are these days....its outrageous. Also, today is Day 5 and I am still having heavy bleeding. I called the doctor's office on Day 3 and they said even though its out the ordinary for me, they're not concerned about it until Day 10!! By then I'll be so weak and sick, but I can't be an exception to the rules. I took a pregnancy test right before I started the Provera, so I hope that it was invalid and I miscarried :-( Not that I would ever be able to know that (I don't think), so I might as well stop worrying about it now, what's done is done. The months that you don't concieve are since God wanted you to have the children that he will give you, when he has it planned for you.

Today I am also going to start Weight Watchers AGAIN. I need to do this for myeslf and for my future children. I read last night that miscarriagea are more common in women that are overweight and since I know that women with PCOS also have a higher instince of it, I need to lower that factor as much as I can. Regardless, this extra weight is taking a toll on me physically..I'm always tired and too lazy to do things. Also, you have less risks for yourself and the baby if you're at a healthy weight. I hope to lose weight and concieve on the way, however not to lose then 100 that I want to lsoe and then get pregnant because that is going to be a lot of waiting time. So, heres to a new adventure in life..a new body...a new MD and hopefully soon, a new baby :-)